Forgiveness: a continuation of the acceptance theme

I was just re reading my last blog entry and it touched me all over again. Thought I would share the latest progression of I LOVE ME and how this judgement vs acceptance dance has gotten me down and dirty with the notion of forgiveness.

Not sure I have some wonderful words of wisdom to impart am still in the wonder phase myself and am curious about the monkey of grudges on my own back. It is almost like an old back pack, loaded down and heavy with sharp jagged rocks poking me in the sides, slumping me over, putting creases in my forward as I twist my face into a scowl of disappointment. It sure seems to me that any old trespasses that we don't forgive we carry around waiting for repayment, waiting for that person to be different or waiting for the world to be different because folks in our lives a long time ago were let us down and we can see that that is due to their own human imperfection just like our own. Or at least this is the way I experience all this right now.

Don't get me wrong...anger wasn't an inappropriate emotion to feel and felt move thru but when the anger becomes a grudge...well that is just calling for the remedy of forgiveness and practicing I LOVE ME gives me the patience with myself to get there little by little.

I feel pretty clear forgiveness is for more a gift for me. I get to let go of expectations that are hopeless in their possibility of every coming true and so as I let go, I unhook the other from any obligation but more importantly I begin taking rocks out of the back pack and maybe even one day will take it off.

Whew...I wonder if I will know how to walk being that light? Will the wind just blow me over if I am not clutching after some grudge or expectation to keep me in place? I suspect this fear of what is on the other side of letting go of my hand holds is best melted away by I LOVE ME. I will keep you posted on what is on the other side of the "back pack/ monkey free" journey. The load is already feeling lighter after years of work on myself.

I hope for you the load is light, that I LOVE ME helps you face the fear of what is on the other side of growing up and letting go of old crappola.

I hope you are staying warm and cozy in this cold winter!
Traci